David Deida's 3 Stages
As a woman, you man find yourself growing through three stages in relationship to the masculine force. First, you feel this force as something outside of you, something that is more powerful than you. You look to another as your savior, whether he is a husband, therapist, teacher, or close friend. You may find yourself depending on his guidance, support, and knowledge, afraid to lose it, worried that he might leave you for another woman he finds more attractive. You may find yourself playing the helpless victim to his ways, either grateful for his wisdom or tolerating his abuse – or both.
Eventually, you may grow into a second stage, where you “come into your own.” That is, you discover and cultivate your own masculine directionality and consciousness. You may start a new career or pursue higher education. You learn to make your own decisions, independent of a man or other outside influence. You refuse to be a victim – but you also miss the pleasure of opening to a man’s loving presence. You become more whole and autonomous as a person, but as a side effect of guarding yourself, you also feel less fulfilled sexually and emotionally.
The third stage begins when you know that you don’t depend on a man, that you can make your own decisions and guide your own life, and yet you are tired of keeping up your guard; you want to relax in your feminine body and emotions. You want to stop protecting your heart. You want to swoon into the bliss of utter surrender, spiritually, emotionally and sexually.
In the first stage, you seek this masculine force in a man on whom you could depend. In the second stage, you seek to depend on yourself for this masculine force. In the third stage, you don’t depend on others or yourself: You practice opening directly and being permeable to the ever-present force of divine masculine consciousness itself.
David Deida on money:
“Generally speaking, the more someone is clear in their priorities and able to stay consistently on purpose, the more money they are able to earn. This is why money is sexy: Money is a stepped-down version of free masculine consciousness, and every woman feels this. A man who is very conscious, present, full of humor, and wealthy is sexy. These qualities – consciousness, presence, humor, and wealth – reflect different levels of the attainment of masculine freedom; a person with these qualities is sexy to you if you have a feminine sexual essence.”
I may refer to these ideas in future posts.