Sex and Happiness
Does getting laid make you happy?
Does being happy help you get laid?
Is a man who is not getting laid fundamentally angry?
Is a man who is getting laid fundamentally happy?
Whether sex 'makes you happy' or not is a false dualism.
They are mutually exclusive.
Like anger and playfulness.
Like confidence and esteem.
Like animalistic sex and empathic connection.
Like peanut butter and chocolate.
Three understandings that I encourage (to help you attain more sex, not necessarily more happiness):
1. Animal impulses represent a natural harmony of opposites independent of intimacy, tenderness, acceptance, approval, validation, and other egoic drives.
2. Society portrays SNLs/ONSs/sex-without-love as crude, selfish, and animalistic in an attempt to preserve the institution of marriage. (Average Frustrated Community Guy starts to learn that women love no-strings sex and have insatiable sex drives, but still experiences a lot of guilt from value system programming that prevents him from declaring things like 'I want to have sex with 100s of women.')
3. A single evening of sex can be totally free of mutual exploitation. It can indeed be full of empathy, connection, gratitude, sensuality, eroticism, foreplay, afterplay, and, yes, animalistic fucking. It can be fun, rewarding, and rich while maintaining independence and emotional involvement for all parties.
A good thread would be called "On Lust" and everyone weighs in. That's one topic that - surprisingly - the community rarely talks about.
PS. I'll tell you why "Ilovethepickupscene." Because I never expected it to change my life. I did not come to the community expecting it to bring me happiness. Or success, or empowerment, or enlightenment, or whatever.
I sucked with women. And I knew that it was only up to me to change that.
I don't feel duped, cheated or misled in any way.
The community is amusing. It's entertaining. It's immensely helpful for getting girls.
It's allowed me to build friendships with men too.
I think that's pretty cool.