Friday, August 07, 2009

To Have Fun, Be Fun!

Let's face it. Women today are frustrated. In these high-tech times, few women can get through the day without encountering some form of frustration.

Here's the thing. As my recent informal survey reveals, the source of this frustration is increasingly a result of romantic relationships with MEN!

Consider this:

45 out of 50 women report that their men always were white socks - even with black shoes!

48 out of 50 report regularly having to put the toilet seat down.

A full 50 out of 50 women have been preempted by a televised sporting event!

Then when I found out that American women spend $500 million a year buying vibrators, I knew something had to be done. I knew I had to put myself out there. I am going to do my part to put these 'toys' out of service!

Here is my promise:

I will never put you in a car and say, "so where do you want to go?" I like to remain a bit unpredictable, but I guarantee fun. You can just sit back and trust my lead.

I will never flirt with your sister, flirt with your mother, criticize your friends, or ignore you in public. When I am with you, I give you my full attention (because I like the same).

I will never claim ignorance in bedmaking, lovemaking, ironing, cleaning or cooking. Around here, I do the cooking (and usually the dishes).

I will not buy tickets to MY favorite concert or sporting event for YOUR birthday.

I will not ask for a backrub and never offer one.

I will kiss you right and kiss you often.

GoneSavage

2 Comments:

Anonymous Slash said...

Gone Savage...you are right about the frustrations...but honestly I could care less about the toilet seat, or even the occasional sporting event. Cheating, lying, misrepresentation, disrespect...just flat out rudeness.
I have all but lost hope that there are any men out there worth my attention. I wish I knew just one guy who could understand the things you write about, who was so positive about women, who understood the joys that are possible between two people...

August 07, 2009  
Blogger The Raj NYC said...

What's wrong with back rubs?! I really do love to give them to fit girls. Plus I feel like it helps make them more comfortable before we have sex.

(Great posts, by the way - very fun reads.)

August 11, 2009  

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