25 Things About My Sexuality, part 1
So, I'm now working on my list.
1. My first time was in a tent. I was 17, she was 16. We met in chemistry class during a powerfully compassionate moment when she was crying and I simply held out my hand to her. We had never taken much notice of each other before, but we held hands that entire class period. It turned out she had been date raped, gotten pregnant, had an abortion, and was being ostracized by her parents. I was naive and nervous and I wanted her to feel safe having sex again, so our courtship was slow. I read a bunch of books on sexual technique. After about 3 months of dating and exploring each other, I finally felt confident enough to make love. So I bought a tent and drove her out to the country. I gave her a massage plus tons of foreplay. Then I penetrated her. I wore a rubber and neither of us came. But I remember thinking how beautiful it was because we were so deeply in love.
2. After that, we had sex all the time. On many nights, I would drive to her neighborhood, park at a church a few blocks away, sneak in through her window, and we'd have quiet sex until we fell asleep in each other's arms. Her parents would leave for work super early, so we'd then have loud sex before school. My sexual confidence grew as I learned to make her come by her clit or her g-spot. I felt like a champion because I could make her come with my fingers, my tongue, and my cock. I decided that orgasms were the most beautiful expressions of love. And I loved the power I felt by giving them to her. Eventually I was able to orgasm as well through fucking, though it was always my decision -- my thrusting -- and I could go for hours if I wanted. I never came orally with her.
3. I dedicated my freshman year of college commuting three hours every weekend to continue my relationship with this girl. We lasted nearly two years. Then she dumped me for someone in her class. I was devastated. Though, oddly, I was not single long. This girl that I worked with at the radio station took interest in me. A sexy Italian girl. The first time we got intimate, I kept myself from going all the way, telling her that I was still in love with my ex. I took our intimacy so slowly that I actually made her come through stimulating her nipples. This was new and novel to me! Then I found out she was hugely orgasmic in many ways. This was great for my ego. Even better was that fact that she was actually able to suck me off.
4. After a few weeks, my first girlfriend came back crying and apologizing. I told her I was seeing someone, but we weren't committed. I don't think I told my new girl anything, but for a few weeks I felt like a champ because I had two girlfriends: one at college and one back home. It became vastly erotic for me to think about Friday when I would fuck my college girl right before I left, then go have my other girl suck her pussy juice off my cock. I was 19 and had no idea how to orchestrate threesomes at the time, but this act alone was enormously erotic. Eventually I dumped the old girlfriend -- and that strain of a commute -- after all, my new girfriend was sexy and the sex was incredible.
5. We became exclusive and actually moved in together. I focused on my artwork while working full time and going to school full time. Sex was becoming routine, but I stayed committed. She took a class trip to Spain, and when she got back she said that she'd cheated on me. I calmly asked her why she didn't tell me when she called from Spain. She said that she thought I'd have blown up at her. We didn't even fight about it at all. She moved out and I took over the lease. We still worked together doing banquets and catering, and we occasionally had really passionate break-up sex, though we never considered getting back together. Instead, I systematically seduced and fucked 5 of our female coworkers (there was actually a 6th who resisted my charms at the time, but I fucked her years later on a chance meeting).
6. I went into my first period of promiscuity, age 21-23. This coincided with learning language patterns that I first found on the Internet. I did not have a PC, so I looked this stuff up in the computer lab. I bought material to study on cassette tape and VHS tape. (It should also be noted that phone calls were made on landlines back then.) Anyway, this was a period of great excitement and hyper-sexuality. Maybe I gave this material too much credit at the time, but it was definitely allowing me to communicate unlike any of my peers. I had sex with 40 or more women in this time period. I specifically went for girls of different races and all social classes. It was all about novelty and variety. Most of these were not one night stands, as I was already skilled in my sexual technique, and I wanted to keep them coming back. I was just crazy enough to try to keep a steady rotation of 5 to 6 fuck buddies at a time. I realized most of my sexual tastes (that will show up later on this list) during that period of experimentation.
7. My third girlfriend came at the end of this phase. This sounds crazy, but I was on spring break and had already fucked four girls that week. My last night in the hotel was her first. We were both in Florida, but from Georgia -- I went to UGA in Athens, and she went to GA State in Atlanta. We chatted only a bit and when I left in the morning, I stuck a flirtatious note on her door. The funny thing is, my buddy took my note and left his note to the same girl in its place. With his number. Weeks later -- she calls him -- to ask for my number! She said that I was so memorable because I picked her up and spun her when we met. This began another slow courtship. Except this time, she was putting on the brakes and getting me to emotionally invest. By the time we made love, I was hooked. Sex with her was so goddamn good that I eventually lost interest in all the fuck buddies I'd accumulated and found myself in another long-term long-distance relationship.
8. We ended up staying together for three years. The summer that I graduated, we road tripped together through 35 states for 3 months. We also went to Burning Man. People there told us that it was tough for couples to stay together because of all the temptation in such a sexually charged environment. But we were so connected, the experience actually enhanced our intimacy -- I don't remember any real temptation. The next summer we road tripped again, including a month in Alaska, and when it came time for Burning Man, she flew back to Atlanta, and I stayed on the road. We talked about the sexual nature of the event, and we decided on a "don't ask, don't tell" policy. Whatever I did at Burning Man would stay at Burning Man. I took full advantage of that pardon and slept with 5 girls that week. What was particularly sinister is that I picked up the first girl in the airport right after my girlfriend caught her flight. She was from CT. We had sex that night, several times the next day, and then I drove her to the playa, we fucked once more, and then I never saw her again. Then there was the Reno girl that I picked up using a British accent the whole time, the girl from NM who told me she'd never given head, some other girl that I fucked in a random tent, and the girl from CO that I stayed with the last two nights and fucked on top of her RV. This all may have been well and good except for my compulsive desire to document things. About a month after my return -- and we were living together -- I was having a relaxing bath one night when I hear this loud thud. I get out, grab a towel, and see my laptop smashed. She'd thrown it against the wall. Then I hear my girl's car peeling off and driving away. I actually chase her in my car -- blinking my lights and honking my horn -- not having any idea why she's suddenly gone mad. Finally she pulls over, rushed over and attacks me, and then describes the sexual escapades that she's just read about. Oh shit. I begged and cried for forgiveness. We smoothed things over for awhile, until I caught her having a steamy phone conversation one night. It turned out she was having an affair -- and get this -- it had been going on the whole time I was on the road, all the way back to the time I was at Burning Man!
9. So I decided my love for the road was greater than my love for any woman. I threw all my stuff in storage, quit my job, and started vagabonding full-time. I was now entering my second phase of promiscuity in 2005 as an auto-camping adventurer. My third year at Burning Man was also unique. Expecting to do the same thing as the previous year, I hooked up with a girl on the first night. Then, on the second day I met another girl that I really connected with and stayed with her for that whole week. It was the most intense short-term relationship ever. We were inseparable. She was a singer with a sexy voice, and was part of one of the large theme camps. She lived in NY, but had family in CA. She invited me to her father's cabin in the redwoods after the burn. I'm thinking a dilapidated outhouse in the woods, but this place was lush. So we spent a week out there cooking, connecting, and making love. Later that year, she flew in to visit me twice --when I was travelling SF and then again in LA. This is also the only girl that I simultaneously felt a tremendous connection with and trusted when she said she was on birth control to actually bust my nut inside of her. This is a really big deal to me.
10. I love the novelty and potential risk of having sex in public places. I love the feeling of being so in control that I can deliver exquisite pleasure while making sure that we don't get caught, such that you can just lose yourself in the sensation. Not counting group sex experiences, here are some of the more remarkable places I have had intercourse: In a school, a church, a cemetery, a library, roadsides, rest stops, railroad tracks, in a storage closet, in an empty storage shed at Home Depot, in unfinished homes, in stairwells, under stairwells, an elevator, an airplane, while driving, while someone else was driving, in someone else's parked car, on top of an RV, in an RV while her parent's were driving, under a few bridges, under a boardwalk, at the base of a lighthouse, in a lighthouse, against a tree, in a tree (a hollow redwood), picnic tables, playgrounds, city parts, state parks, national parks, the Atlantic, the Pacific, rivers, lakes, in a raft, on a ship, in a random docked boat, on random boat docks, in waterfalls, in jacuzzis, a couple caves, on boulders, on sand dunes, on the playa in the daytime, on a cliff, in a fort, on a suspension bridge, at the top of a lookout tower, in a club (fully exposed, not the bathroom), in several concert venues, in a planetarium, in a parking garage, in a hotel lobby, underneath the fireworks on a crowded public lawn (got caught), underneath a banquet table (got caught), and on a few rooftops.